um.

i didn’t go to work today.  i don’t feel good but not like a shouldn’t have gone to work but more of a… i don’t know what i’m doing! not feeling good. my apartment is a mess.  i tried to reorganize and clean today but it kind of only put me into a frenzy of dissatisfaction.  right now, i don’t even know where to start. i’m in the place where i want to throw everything away.  honestly, i would’ve done a lot more of that already but i’m down to the last two garbage bags.  sadly, that’s enough to stop me.

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i feel overheated. bordering on frantic. trying to chill out but am having a difficult time of it. wtf is wrong here?  with me, right now?  eff it. i’m going to do some thing-tossing. meaning, figure out a way to haul it down and out to the dumpster and say fuck it, goodbye shit i can’t find a place for.

this is weird especially because usually when i feel this frenzied need to clean, i’m pms-y and today i’m not even close.  it’s a weird feeling… but don’t worry, i’ll be fine.

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